Tuesday, May 8, 2012

RESURRECTION !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It's been a week since I was devastated into pieces (sumpah ini gak lebay) because of a shocking announcement of an anatomy exam. The test didn't go well last time but I still had an expectation that I could pass it. The thing wasn't as I expected. I failed and it tore me down. Maybe it's kinda not cool to feel such a thing like that. But If you ever do something 100% for it or even more but at the end you fail to get your goal, I  bet you'll have the same the feeling as I have. For some people it seems like a normal problem, but for me it's not. I tried to resist my bad feeling and try again in the remedial test. It was hard to study the whole thing again and it pissed me off.  It was really devastating when I told the things happened to my mom, even though she didn't have any problem with it, but still I still felt guilty for it. The darkest week of my life as medical student began. I knew I wasn't the "real me" a week ago. But I tried, tried, tried just to let go those feelings. But that guiltiness kept putting me in a chain of being such a failure. But thanks god I still had my friends beside me to cheer me up. And Allah is the closest one that helped me get out of this feeling. Gracefully I could embrace the fact that I failed and tried to fix it. My confidence was back and that was all I need. I learned my lesson for this. Thanks mom and dad for your call almost every night to cheer me up, my friends who kept giving me the spirit to resist those guilty feeling, and The Greatest of all, Allah for lifting me out of this darkest hill ever in the last year, I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack!!!!! Be prepared for another tough chapter of this 2nd semester, S-E-M-A-N-G-A-T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!